Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...

So, Wade & I have decided for certain...we are going to move out of Hagerstown.

I don't know when.

I don't know where we'll go once we're out of here (either to my parents', a rental, or right into our new home).

All I know is, we're excited (and also terrified) at the thought.

:)

Invasion of the Body Snatcher

That's right...just one Body Snatcher. My body has been snatched by some loudmouthed, impatient,  sleep-deprived dairy-cow equivalent, and my husband is still the patient, mild-mannered, quiet man he's been since I met him. 

He deserves some sort of award for putting up with such a terrible excuse for a wife.

Apparently, I've been so grouchy lately that he can no longer tell the difference between my nice tone and my "I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS CRAP" tone. Red flag! Someone needs to change her attitude!

I'd like to say that sleep will do the trick, but that's only part of the issue. Most of the issue lies in the unrealistic expectations I have of myself.

Our house is a disaster most days. We have more stuff than we have space. We have more laundry than we have clothing storage options. We have more mess than we (I) have time to clean up. I have to remind myself everyday that I am a stay-at-home MOM, not a stay-at-home housekeeping service. 

I'm also not a machine. I can't honestly expect to have energy for sex when I barely have energy to dress myself for public viewing. I'm usually really happy with myself if I remember to brush my teeth and put on deodorant in the mornings after my shower...that is, on the days that I actually get a shower... And because of the lack of sleep, I'm even more critical of myself because that's how I get when I'm not getting adequate sleep. I get hypercritical. And then, because I'm picking on myself and telling me how horrible of a wife I am and how awful a mother I am, I start to get depressed, and that just makes things so much worse. And that, in turn, makes me not want clean the house. It makes me want to knit or sew or crochet and play with my son because those things make me feel a little less crappy.

I used to be fun to be around. That no longer seems to be the case. So, hopefully, the Body Snatchers will return my former self and make things right in my world again. 

That's all I need. My self. And sleep. And, well, some really good lovin'.